Learn how to identify the eight difficult feelings and acknowledge how they are common emotional reactions to situations and events.
- Perhaps you are asking, how then, do you develop into a more confident, emotionally stronger and more capable person? As odd as it seems, the answer is tied to the capacity, your capacity, to tolerate pain, or more simply, your capacity to handle unpleasant feelings. The more you are able to face the pain that you experience, the more capable you become. The essential keys to developing confidence and feeling emotionally strong and being resilient involve holding a positive attitude towards pain, that's the first thing. A second, a willingness to learn from any experience. A third, an openness to change. And last, a capacity to experience and express unpleasant feelings. Here are the eight feelings I always talk about. Sadness, helplessness, vulnerability, disappointment, shame, anger, embarrassment, and frustration. No doubt, you may have added a whole number of other feelings to this list, and you may be wondering why these eight? And, it's these eight because they are the most common everyday spontaneous reactions to life events or situations or circumstances not turning out the way you want or the way you perceive that you need. It's the everydayness of these feeling reactions. They're so common. Now, I didn't include fear or anxiety or guilt or loneliness or other feelings for a wide number of reasons. And know that I've had a front row seat to emotional pain for decades. And what I've found is that these same eight feelings, if you avoid them, they get in the way of confidence and happiness, resilience, authenticity, success, and also your ability to handle change, loss and grief. What continues to amaze me is that these same eight feelings are at the center of it all. So set aside 10 minutes for yourself to simply reflect on the variety of life events or situations that you've had to face and that you've found difficult to face. And notice how often these same eight feelings of sadness, helplessness, vulnerability, disappointment, shame, anger, and embarrassment, and frustration are at the center of it all.
- Understanding difficult feelings
- Defining grief
- Dealing with loss and change
- Supporting grieving colleagues
- Returning to work