What is it like to be coached by you? Learn the three pillars of every successful coaching relationship.
- What's it like to be coached by you? Really think about it. What is it like to be coached by you? Are you too tough, too sensitive, demanding, encouraging? If you want to have a more successful coaching relationship with your team, there are three things you need to be good at. The first is empathy. As a coach, you need the ability to put yourself in someone else's shoes. For example, public speaking might come naturally to you.
Without empathy, you'd be likely to look at someone who isn't good at it and think, "What's your problem? "Just get out there and do it." Empathy would be imagining, what would it feel like to be petrified? Can you imagine what it would feel like to have your mind go totally blank in front of a room full of people? Without empathy, your frame is yourself. As a coach, your frame should be on the other person. That doesn't mean you need to wallow in pity with them.
It means you approach a situation without judgment. The second thing every coaching relationship needs is accountability. Coaching conversations are pointless if nothing happens. When you agree on a time to meet, make sure you're there. Same with agreeing to action items, follow-ups, or ground rules for the coaching relationship. Holding your employees and yourself accountable sets the relationship up as one that is both productive and respectful.
How good are you at holding people accountable and following up? Do you set dates and times or do you just say, "Get back to me"? Finally, you'll need some level of job understanding. You will not be able to coach if you don't understand the basics of what your employee does on a day to day basis. That said, it doesn't mean you need to be better at their job than they are. For example, I'm never going to coach an astronaut on how to navigate in space, but I could coach them on how to handle press conferences.
I coach several CEOs because I know the skills of leading and communicating. I don't need to know their manufacturing process. Think about your employees. How well do you know their jobs and what it takes to be successful in them? Look at these three items: empathy, accountability, and job understanding. Let's go back to the question I asked when we started. What's it like to be coached by you? How would your team rate you in each of these three areas? Be honest.
When I first asked myself this question, I reached the conclusion that being coached by me could be pretty frustrating. I'm good at empathy but I wasn't always good at next steps. I've gotten a lot better at holding people accountable. When you focus on empathy, accountability, and tactical understanding, you'll be a coach worth listening to.
- Define coaching.
- Describe the foundation for successful coaching.
- Explain how to coach someone who is older than you.
- Articulate how to coach someone who makes excuses.
- Identify how to coach poor performers or bad communicators.