This video establishes ground rules for communicating effectively: how to focus the conversation, find common ground, and avoid falling into old conflicts.
- In many conversations,…feeling heard and accepted is not a given.…Let's identify the two biggest communication mistakes…that couples make when discussing money…and learn how to create a more productive dialogue.…The first mistake is believing that financial arguments…can be won by presenting facts.…Trust me, this never works.…Even when something seems irrefutable,…like "We have to save for the future,"…it can be met with "We might regret not living for today."…This is why the financial values piece is so critical.…
"It's important to me" is a very different statement than…"We have to" or "We should."…You can't argue what's important to another person.…But engaging around values requires us…to be incredibly vulnerable, which leads us…to the second mistake.…When things get heated, we self-protect…by shutting down the emotional connection.…In counseling sessions…I often have to play the part of a conductor.…Holding the structure and focus…for those difficult parts of the conversation.…"How do you feel about your partner handling…
In this course, financial therapist Amanda Clayman shows how to tackle the financial difficulties that often sour partnerships by walking through how to create and follow a family cash flow plan. Using her five pillars of financial harmony as a guide, Amanda explains how to construct a plan that engages all family members in its implementation. Looking at money management as a system designed to meet your specific needs, she highlights common financial conflicts and shows how to create a healthy, sustainable plan. She explains how to establish ground rules for communicating effectively, prioritize each partner's "asks," assign money management roles suited to each partner's strengths, and bring it all together into a working plan.
- Why couples fight about money
- Exploring values
- Communicating effectively
- Being clear and concrete
- Negotiating successfully
- Assigning roles suited to each partner's strength
- Setting up a routine
- Creating your family cash flow plan
- Dealing with dilemmas
- Making changes
- Engaging children in your family's cash flow management process