There will be times as a mentor when your protégé looks to you for an answer they need to solve. This video will help you help your protégé make their own decisions.
- Sometimes proteges approach mentors like a magic eight ball. It is so tempting, as a mentor, to try and magically have all the answers to proteges' questions. By way of example, I'm gonna share how to guide your protege through a discernment process so they can make great decisions on their own. Recently, a protege came to me for help in making big decisions. She told me she was having major problems with her boss and was unhappy in her marriage.
She said she wanted to quit her job, get a divorce, and take her kids and move overseas to be with her family. When my protege presented all this to me she asked me point blank, what should I do? Here's the Three-Step Discernment Approach I shared with her. The first step is to pause. The primary rule of good discernment is to avoid making any decisions when you are in a place of desolation, like a state of panic or extreme emotion. So, first, I suggested that she pause just for today before any decisions were made.
The second step is to be indifferent to the decision. This does not mean you don't care about your protege or their choice, in fact, quite the contrary. Instead, it means that as a mentor you must step back and really detach yourself from your protege's choices and how they affect you. You want to be a neutral guide and not a judge. The third step is to reflect on different realities.
This means thinking through different options and imagining the repercussions. It's also helpful to put a time limit on each reflection. For example, have your protege imagine one option for two days, then imagine another option for two days, and then have them reflect and report back. The idea here is you keep taking small steps and reflecting along the way. As a mentor, you guide your protege along the path towards clarity.
In the end, my protege did decide to keep her job and divorce her husband, but not move her kids overseas. These were tough decisions, but I think she felt a lot of peace because her decision-making process was really sound. As a mentor, it was a joy to help her find the clarity she needed.
She also offers guidance on building trust and chemistry, providing feedback, and helping your protégé make critical career and work decisions and become resilient in the face of challenges. She also helps you address common obstacles, including a protégé that fails to meet expectations or violates trust, and explains how to gracefully exit the relationship.
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- Building a relationship with your protégé
- Talking and listening with impact
- Giving feedback
- Developing trust
- Setting goals
- Developing your protégé's skills
- Managing mentoring relationships
- Overcoming common obstacles
- How to make time for mentoring