Talking to kids about race

- So, this is a question I get all the time, how do I talk about race with my kids? And listen, it's awkward for everybody. It, we want to avoid these conversations, right? But the reality is, if you don't have these conversations with your kids about race, they're going to hear it from somebody else. They're going to hear it from their friends, they're going to hear it from their teachers and they certainly are going to hear it from the media. So we want to put you in a position to where you have a positive influence on their understanding of the situation. And remember, there's a rule of thumb, try to speak less than you listen, right? So we want to have the 70/30 rule. So, my goal is to speak only 30% of the time and listen, 70% of the time. So it's not about the answers that you have, it's about the questions that you ask. So that's how you can start the conversation. So here's an example. You can start by saying, "How do you feel about this situation?" Listen to their response, hear the emotion, acknowledge and validate that emotion. "It sounds like this really bothered you. "It sounds like this had an impact on you." And then we can transition into getting curious with compassion. "So, how do you think we got here as a country?" And then the next step is joint problem-solving. We're turning this into a brainstorming session about next steps. What can we do as a family to help make the world a better place? And remember, this is not just about creating a trusting relationship with your child. That's a big part of it, but it's not just that. It's also about equipping the next generation with the skills they need to have these difficult conversations about race. The more confident they are in the process, the more likely they are to use it when it's their turn to lead and that's what we want to see in the next generation.