Listen as a coach

- Think about coaching, and you're likely to envision the football locker room. Players gather around the loud, charismatic coach who is sharing a motivational message with the team. That common image paints the picture that coaching is all about speaking forcefully and saying the right things. The truth is, one of the most important coaching skills is listening, active, intense listening. Your communication style is certainly important, but great coaches in the business world improve their impact with exceptional listening skills. Let's be honest, we all get side tracked by everything going on around us, e-mail notifications, phones ringing, people walking by our office. Listening can be tough, but strong coaches work to over come those distractions. To help you coach more effectively, here are five strategies you can use to improve your listening skills. First, listen on a deeper level. Great coaches know how to get team members talking so they can access their approaches. Not just their solutions, but how they arrived at those solutions. They listen for that information by prompting them with open-ended questions, like what options have you explored. How did you choose your final recommendation? What results are you expecting? Coaches who listen for the broader context can guide team members to make smart decisions, and improve their decision making skills for the future. Second, be patient with your listening. This one takes some discipline. Before you start with a coaching session, try to get into the right mindset. Remind yourself that their success is a shared success. Your position as a coach is to be on their side, to be their advocate, and if need be, their accountability system. Then give your employee your full attention. Focus, keep your head in the game, be patient for them to finish rather than cutting them off mid sentence, and don't jump in with advice or volunteer the answer. Third, demonstrate that you're actively listening. While you work on being patient and mentally engage, make sure your body language isn't sending a different message. Remove outside distractions that could naturally divert your attention. Put away your phone, move away from your computer, maybe hold the meeting in a different location, make eye contact and try not to fidget in your chair. Fourth, clear up any confusion. As you listen, identify areas that sound vague or contradictory. Ask for clarification. Sometimes you can uncover critical information about the project or the process when you prompt an employee to further explain a particular decision that may have been glossed over. Finally, summarize and paraphrase. This is one of the best incentives for coaches to listen for meaning, and fully focus during their time with team members. At the end of a session you should provide a concise summary of the conversation by paraphrasing what you heard the employee say. When you summarize the message, you can confirm that you understand their intent, that you are on the same page, and that you value their thinking. By following these five steps, you can improve your listening style and make a positive impact on your coaching process.