Tired of trying to build rapport with colleagues by asking, "What did you do this weekend?" Dr. Todd gives you tips for how to move beyond transactional communication so you can build next-level rapport with people at work.
(upbeat music) - Simple communication is just a transaction, an exchange of mere words, which anyone can do. It's not that impressive. Now, in contrast, rapport is about building a bond. It's about sharing not just words, but feelings and emotions as well. So, why should you care? Because next level rapport establishes stronger connections, deeper relationships, and that almost always leads to higher productivity and better retention.
So, your goal at work is to start injecting more of that next level conversation into your team. But how do you do that? Try this. Share some mistakes. Make yourself laughable and human, and thus more approachable. Talk about your hobbies. Let people know what you do when you're not at work. Whether that's hiking or old movies, it doesn't matter. The more you share, the more you have a chance to build a bond and some rapport. How about our families? We love our families, but we don't talk about them enough.
Ask someone about their kids, and watch them light up. One of the best pieces of advice is to show more empathy. Just try to listen, and when people speak show respect, maybe even interest in how they think and how they feel. But you know what? There are many ways to build great rapport. Let's go talk to a few people and get their ideas. (upbeat music) So, when you think about building real camaraderie with your colleagues, I mean real rapport, what types of behaviors come to mind? - I often go to where are you from, where'd you grow up, or I think about engaging them on a more personal note.
- Genuine connection. That's my thing, you know? Creating a commonality, whether it's with humor, or with conversation, or maybe we both have kids, or whatever it might be, creating actual, real connection. Take a moment and be personal with somebody. I think once you start with that as a root, the tree grows, man. - I feel like just being really genuine in the workplace and being who you are, bringing your actual personality into your work, but not trying to pretend like you're someone else really contributes to that. And also if you can really connect with someone in an area that they are familiar and comfortable with, like asking them about their area of expertise so that they have an opportunity to explain something they're passionate about, and you have a actual opportunity to learn from them is a great way to break that ice and get comfortable really quickly.
- So, you've kind of reduced tension by allowing them to be an expert and start the conversation easily. - Exactly. - Nice. If you're a leader, you need to hear this. Your team might be complying with what you ask, but the real question is, are they committed? Are they emotionally engaged and with you? If not, it is time to let down that professional wall just a little bit, to loosen up just a little bit, and start building next level rapport.