Fred and John: Moving from defeat to pride

- My intuition is that there is a little bit of poison under the scar tissue, and that's why it's tender. So even though it happened many years ago, and your words are very wise. There's still some something there. A lesson that you haven't fully learned yet. And it's like your soul is asking you, "learn this lesson then we'll close it fully". It's like... - What is it? - What is... (both laughing) - That's the thing. What is the lesson? I mean, the biggest lesson I think you've already learned. Which is, it's not what they do, it's how you respond. That's a very big lesson. And I think you've learned that. - At a very young age and in the career at that point, how do that John, you know? - That John did the best he could. I think it's also part of the lesson. The compassion. It was good enough. Because that John survived to become this John. You could have been broken. You were not. That's pretty good. So I think you're being a bit harsh with yourself. Because you are speaking as though that had been a shattering event. It wasn't. - No. - It was painful. - Yeah. - But you got through it. And you became the person you are now. That is worth a lot. So, there's some judgment I hear like, "Oh, that John didn't do it!" Oh my God, you were dealing with some really awful situation when you were so young. - Yeah. Now, the organization turned out to be non-responsive. But then you left. - Mmm-hmm. - That's an act of power. Because you are telling the story like that's an act of defeat. I always tell people, "you know, your ultimate strength... (slaps leg) It's here." Because you can always walk, and you did walk. Walking is not surrendering. Walking is taking responsibility for your life. But you're telling the story as though walking was a defeat. For me, it's the opposite. - Mmm-hmm. - For me, walking was the act of defiance. It's, "I'm leaving. I'm not staying in place where I'm not recognized." Yes, could you have sued? Maybe, but I don't know. The act of leaving is not a retreat. The act of leaving is a gesture of defiance. You chose how to live your life, and you became who you are. That kind of pride is missing in your story. I don't hear that pride. - Mmm - I hear the story and I say, I'd be proud. I see a defiant man saying I did the right thing and then I left. - Yeah. - And here I am. - Thank you. It's funny. (laughs) It's funny, you know, because you could see that clarity, right. I feel like we've just been able to filter out things better for me. - Thank you. - Thank you.