Active listening

- Too often, we listen for a response and not for understanding. We focus on getting our message heard in a noisy world but not enough on effective listening in a distracting world. And this leads me to another really important element of performance feedback. Engage in active listening when receiving feedback. One way to do this is to be proactive in cleaning distractions like phones, multitasking, loud environments. Look at the person and listen to understand. Be mindful of being quiet and allowing the messenger to speak. Shh. Listen. Just sit and be present. Soak in the feedback that is being given. The first step to active listening is to be quiet and listen. After a message is said, one powerful tool is to repeat back what has been said so that you can clarify the message and identify any understanding gaps. At this moment, don't seek to add any additional dialogue or to be tasteless in your repetition of the message. Approach the repeat of message with an attitude of further clarification and understanding. Repeat your understanding of what feedback has been given and allow an opportunity for the messenger to give any necessary clarification or additional information. You can also be mindful in asking clarifying questions when repeating the message or after the feedback has been delivered. You might still have a few questions about the message. Be mindful and ask clarifying questions. You can ask prompting questions like, "Can you tell me more? "Can you expand? please explain." And you can also ask specific questions like, "When you said that you wanted a quicker response time, "did you mean within the day or within the hour?" Ask mindful, clarifying questions. So often we can focus on the feedback that we give. But we should be intentional about the way that we receive feedback. So here's what I want you to do. Next time that someone wants to give you feedback, try your best to clear distractions, be mindful, to sit and seek to understand. Be intentional about being an active listener.