Influencing Others
Illustration by Neil Webb

Be influenceable


From:

Influencing Others

with John Ullmen
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Video: Be influenceable

The 17th method is, be influenceable. In my research I spoke at length with Tony Hsieh, the founder and CEO of Zappos.com, which he led to being a sensationally successful business with a vibrant culture and very happy employees. He's one of the most influential leaders of his era. But, he's also one of the most influenceable people you'll ever meet. Tony says, being humble is not thinking less of yourself, it's about thinking of yourself less.

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Watch the Online Video Course Influencing Others
1h 21m Appropriate for all Apr 21, 2014

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Ever had trouble persuading someone to do something, even if it was in their best interest? Sometimes people don't budge, but thankfully you have more than rewards and penalties at your disposal. Join John Ullmen, PhD, as he explains how to influence others when you're at the "pivot point of influence," by applying 18 scientifically confirmed methods. Whether you're influencing at work or at home, you'll learn what the best influencers do before they influence, and see how to choose the best steps for your situation, and have people want to be influenced by you.

This course qualifies for 1.25 Category A professional development units (PDUs) through lynda.com, PMI Registered Education Provider #4101.

Topics include:
  • Turning objections into actions
  • Adding more impact to your ideas
  • Establishing urgency
  • Using the influence advantage checklist
  • Influencing to inspire
  • And many more....

  • The PMI Registered Education Provider logo is a registered mark of the Project Management Institute, Inc.
Subject:
Business
Author:
John Ullmen

Be influenceable

The 17th method is, be influenceable. In my research I spoke at length with Tony Hsieh, the founder and CEO of Zappos.com, which he led to being a sensationally successful business with a vibrant culture and very happy employees. He's one of the most influential leaders of his era. But, he's also one of the most influenceable people you'll ever meet. Tony says, being humble is not thinking less of yourself, it's about thinking of yourself less.

Being influenceable isn't about giving in, giving up, being weak or soft, being scared, or being any less committed to your principles and to excellent results. And, being influencable doesn't mean you're not going to disagree. Being influencable does mean being both open minded and open hearted. Why? Because people tend to open their minds more to people who've opened their own minds. And to open their hearts to people who permit themselves to be inspired. Here's what to do. First, don't win arguments.

Instead, win hearts and minds. Catch yourself when you hear that inner voice saying either, I'm winning this argument, or I'm losing this argument. When you argue, you trigger people's urge to defend themselves or prevail over you. The situation becomes more about winning or losing than gaining, and when that happens, when ego trumps substance you are destined to lose sooner or later. Research on leaders who consider themselves the best problem solver in the group because of their greater intelligence, skill, or experience are less effective because they fail to ask for enough input from others on the team.

Second, let people know in a confident tone that their contributions have a positive effect on you. Say things like, thank you, I hadn't looked at it that way before, or, I appreciate how you're challenging me on this. Third, let them know a positive quality that you're working to improve, such as listening better. But isn't that weak? No, not if you own it and declare it with confidence. It's authentic, they already know that we're not perfect. We're not fooling anyone by pretending there's nothing we need to improve.

Further, it gives them an opening to add value to us that we really want, and when we make a mistake, it invites their understanding and support instead of resentment and frustration. We trust people more who are open to learn. So keep growing and let them know what you want to grow. Influence isn't just about getting our way. It's about earning our way into the hearts and minds of people to make things better.

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